Overwhelm comes to everyone when too many choices or options are before you. You can see this in action at the grocery store. You’ve gone into the store to purchase a box of cereal – there are so many choices, in fact too many choices even if you already have some parameters in mind. Maybe you have a specific cereal in mind but then you are confronted with variables – the size of the box, flavor options, not to mention choices of other similar cereals. Add to that friends and family giving you advice as to which cereal is the best or why one is a better buy or which one is “the healthiest.” Purchasing a box of cereal moves into chaos rather than the straightforward task you anticipated.
Parents, particularly new parents, often find themselves doubting themselves. It’s completely understandable – this is new territory and there are a lot of things to consider. It’s also understandable that they will seek out advice and recommendations from trusted sources which might be family members or friends who have more experience. However, it’s when parents become overwhelmed with advice from solicited and non-solicited sources they begin to doubt everything. On the whole, parents, even new parents, have a lot more intuitive knowledge than they know.
Family members want to provide support, encouragement, and, yes, advice. Listen to that advice from a place of how it aligns with the values and parenting style you would like for your family. If it feels right, consider it and when you are ready, try it. If it seems too “out there” for your comfort then thank them kindly but do what you know is right for your family. Listen to your instincts about your new baby. Parents are much more tuned in than they may realize. Consult your pediatrician or pediatric nurse on matters of your child’s health – feeding, sleeping, general mood, diapering, etc. – they can be a sounding board for any advice that is thrown at you.
The early weeks and months with your little one are a time that is full of emotion. This is your time with your baby to tune into each other’s needs. Parents do well when they keep their circle of advisors and listen to those who wait for you to ask them. First and foremost, listen to your parenting instincts because those are led by your baby and by you – just as they should be.